The Day I Re-Wrote My Relational Rules

Upheaval of the heart has been the theme of the last couple of weeks... and its about that time now for the new set of conclusions and realizations to be laid down and tested over the next couple of years, and hopefully they work better than the last set, so I can then be said to enjoy progress. Though I think I've made progress already - no broken bones, no binge eating, no smoking, no emotional driving... save the alcohol. But 1 out of 5 ain't bad.

And so, the new rules...

Rule #1. Understand that falling in love / being intimate / getting laid / ROCKING EACH OTHER'S FUCKING WORLD, hereafter known as the whole schpiel does NOT equate to or necessitate a relationship, where a relationship is defined by two people giving a chance at together-forever a formal shot.

Rule #2. Not only does it not equate to or necessitate a relationship - any or all of the whole schpiel should NEVER be the REASON to choose a relationship.

And that brings us to

Rule #3. Choose, do not fall, into a relationship.

Rule #4. Choose wisely. A 6 month period of any or all of the whole schpiel before choosing is recommended.

Rule #5. Choose a relationship with someone that chooses to grow with you for the rest of your lives, however you choose to intepret that.


Yes. I am officially a born-again commitment phobe. I think commitment phobes, hereafter known as commie-peebs, had the right idea all along. Commie-peebs have a bad rep in society, and that makes crowd pleasin' pansies like me grow to ensure that I am committed to the girl everytime I get involved in any of all of the whole schpiel. But you know what, its a much better idea not to commit. Cos you fall into love, but commitment is tough and its recipe for failure if you fall into commitment - it really needs to be an active, informed choice. So I'll choose commitment... but only when its right. And until then I'll be clear that the whole schpiel is just what it is - the schpiel. Not a relationship.