Ingrate

Mum's birthday dinner tonight. She must have spent a bundle.

I gave her a small white card in a purple envelope and a few hours to blather about watches, jewels and interior design without being rudely interjected.

This morning at the altar, I asked for more love, gratitude & acceptance.

*sigh* I am my own greatest adversary.

Long live the king

My colleague from the neighboring office flirts with unflagging resolve in our corridor. It's very impressive - even if his redneck-pub pick-up ways are received with more fear than flatter.

SS, you da man.


this is how a manly man drinks his bee-uh.

Searching for sense

As part of a volunteer program at work, yesterday I spoke (albeit very briefly) to an assembly hall bursting with primary school children. I gave a short conclusion following a play that tries to teach kids about finances - solve money problems as a family, start saving early, spend within your means... this, coming from an undercover juvenile whose visa balance outweighs his checking account.

The moment reminded me that the grownups which we once worried we could never become, were never worth becoming anyway. All I wanted to say over the loudspeaker yesterday: "Stay young forever and don't let anything stop you from doing what you want to do, least of all money. And quickly for fuck's sake, before you're filled with fear. Like the rest of us fully grown geezers."

Thanks for the applause at the end of my minute kids, but I wish you were the ones doing the talking.


...along life's long highway, remember to stop and juice the fruit.

a petty entry

So a colleague from another department ends our brief meeting with a flip of my tie to check the label (its from boss), his exit sigh along the lines of "nice tie, I'm underpaid", dripping with class on his way out.

In 3 minutes

I have gone from raising blood toxin levels over my near-fatal visa bill

to falling deeper into this madness.

I'm paul and i'm so damn happy to be alive on this planet. Right here. Right now.

Is your asshole gaping?

I seem to be late to most things, and this would definitely be the case with assimilating into Singapore culture, despite being born here.

I first came across the cover-backside concept when in BMT (that's army bootcamp), under orders to charge up Rambutan Hill. "Kani na, farster cheong or I stick a farking rambutan inside your farking backside!" Admittedly, some sergeants get carried away.

As a corporate rat, I've noticed that CBS (Cover-BackSide) is as omnipresent as it was in the army. I'm not one for anthropological discussion. This post is just a rant. For the sake of little other than the progress of the human tribe, let's take a chance & face the fucking fire. It might kill you to take a risk, but if you're another gutless fruitcake then nobody's gonna miss you anyway.

Thanks for rant-reading. I'm paul and I think its time to flaunt those nuts.

And while we're still onto fair buns...

It's hard to start the day wrong with two tau sar paos. My pale buns were warm and moist today- the red bean stirred to just the right blend of coarseness and cream. Unsurpassed nibbling pleasure. Thanks to Mr Ng Cheng Cho for 58 years of Kong Guan Dumpling.



I really do enjoy being a caged corporate animal, though I guess being in sales, I'm not that much of a caged creature since I still see sunlight and drink smoothies during the day. Still - corp life offers cool dudes to hang with, pretty girls to perve at and impromptu deliveries of munchies ever so often throughout the day. And everyone is so damn nice! Oh, and did I mention the tau sar paos? Yummy. Life is wonderful whenever we want it to be, innit.

Ah yes... it's peachy appreciation day.

Ignore the greed, politics & backstabbing and you're all set.

Make that ass count

We are all intrinsically narcissistic pah-ping! blogger buzzword!. That's why we human tribers tend to rank another human body among the top-performing pleasures on the planet. Sex sells everything, even religion. When was the last time you went to service and realised that half of the boys joined church to meet the gurls? (the other half was gay) Hope enough of you found that funny so I don't get sued.

Roaming our village with my pu tong peng you, I am fascinated by the intensity with which countless pairs of eyes glue themselves to her. Men stare at her ass & smile. Women just stare. Now... how to calculate potential profits from all the unsold advertising space bouncing around me. and how to price...

Butt views today...

The father-son thing

Called dad from a number that he didn't recognize today. He "Hello-ed" in that buttery way that disarms the plump hens.

And then he heard me croak hello.

And his voice dropped...and then my heart.


wish i didn't disappoint, daddy.

Jealous Gina

Something strange happened with the Alfa yesterday. She decided not to start around midnight, right after a quick stop at 7-eleven. The starter turned over real slow, suffering from either a weak battery or a flooded chamber (not sure which), so I had to leave her lonely in P. Pasir for the night. Today, I came in rescue gear in the Toyota with a pair of jumper cables, but strangely enough, the Alfa started up aye OK without any assistance from her Japanese brethren. Truth is, indeed, far stranger than fiction.

My date (a living breathing human, this one) reckons that the Alfa is misbehaving out of jealousy. Pretty possible since I'm actually dating someone who is for once not jealous of the attention which my four-wheeled wife receives! Watch out fellow alfisti, it seems that our cars take badly to this role reversal.

Had to cab back to P. Pasir and retrieve the rescue vehicle but I didn't want to call for one, so I trekked out of my jungle abode to flag a cab, and about 100m down the road I realise that walking & singing along to my ipod is one of life's greatest pleasures.
Take your time uncle, I'm in no hurry to ride your taxi tonight.


Thanks for reading. My name is Paul and a little while ago, I decided that I didn't have to be my father anymore.

My own life is just too much fun. :)

To family

I've not been a great friend. Not a great brother either ... or son, for that matter.

I love my friends and family, but still I disappear for weeks at a time to indulge in someone new in my life, immersed into those moments of sunshine where the center of your universe picks up and runs off to explore a center of the universe somewhere else.

Then suddenly, it becomes difficult to appear at a moment's notice to fix dad's iMac, or to drop by Bonnie's for a beer, and that casual session of late night roller hockey doesn't fit so casually anymore.

I apologize if I ever made you feel less important in my life. All my family in spirit... thank you for being the ones on this planet with me.




Love yer friends, even if they be dA M0B.